<body> im the girl you wanted all along.
IM THE GIRL

MiSs RaInIeGaL
29/09/zzzz
LiBrA GaL

HER NICKS:

TiNgTiNg
XiAoYu
MiSs STM
BlUr QuEeN
XiAyU
SoToNg QuEeN
MeOwMeOwTiNg
CoMpLaInT qUeEn? hahas...

LIVES FER:

FoOd!
SlAcKiN
SlEePiN
TaLkIn
ShOpPiN
ReAdInG
MoViEs
NaiLaRt
NiTeS
FrEnS
HaPpInEsS
CaTs
WaYnE LiN JuN JiE
HeBe
MuSiC
FuN & ExCiTmEnT

FIGHTS WITH:

VuLgArItIeS
TeArS
DeAfEnInG SiLeNcE
HeArTbReAkErS
LiArS
HyPoCrItIeS
BaCkStAbBeRs, BeTrAyErS
SeLfIsHnEsS
BaD hAiR dAy
FlU!!!

YOU HAD WANTED

GoOd GrAdEs (all pass? lols)
MoRe FrEnS
CuTiE Of HeR oWn
CoUnTlEsS $$$
SiNgInG cOuRsEs
SaTiSfAcToRy JoB
HaPpInEsS
50 sMiLeS a DaY =D
LiVe In FaNtAsY dReAm WoRlD

ALL ALONG

P jOy
LyNn
xUeLiNg
mEi JiE
mEi HuI
XiNyU
wAn YinG
LiNg Ta/LyNdA
KeLLy
CeCiLiA
rOaN<
gAo ZhEng
SeRI
KeN
JaSoN tOh
SuYeE
jEaN
ViCtOr
JiE yI
aMiLiA
KeLLy
sHeReEn
ZiQiNg

FORGET THEM


REHIPTRO
horoscope power
___OPH V8 SHIN-go round___
WEDNESDAY wed worked 7-10 for v8 cafe...was quite...
monday, tuesday, wednesday
THURSDAY went out with my girls... going along l...
__PSA scenery__
__what you see is what you get__
__PS PS PS__
__furniture shop classics__

AND SAY


**
 

YOU LOVE ME


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Tuesday, December 26, 2006


this is when we attended this dinner and dance by joy joy de school... named REHIPTRO in which the theme is RETRO. hahas...
black and white pic... too bad mz is not in it... hahas...
me! in the classic black dress white polka dots hahas... cher's no dots became my attire for the night! =)
at the place itself! with joy and jia jin and xin yu! =D
jiajin look so diff here right... she always manages to stun me when ever we see her... hahas... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

12/26/2006 08:57:00 AM

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


been not blogging for long... one reason is no time... sorry guys... another reason is i bu shuai blog lah... cos i have the knowledge that some tom dick harry can just enter here and read all my thoughts...

then what for i set a password "protected" blog to just share thought with my friends or to talk to them? haiz...

mui horoscope for the day:

Dear rain lee,
Here is your horoscope for
Tuesday, December 12:

You have a great need to be of service to others, but you can't do so at the expense of all your resources. It's time to find a happy medium between making others happy and keeping your own batteries charged.

ain this so very true? i always go to where im needed just so people wun suffer so much... bee says she worries for me cos i care too much about others... but at least this is the part where she knows i do not change...

sometimes i wonder whether izzit very overwhelming for her to come back and realise that everybody has changed so much... for me... i've been there through all the changes yet i still kinda cannot take it that well, seriously...

over these two years, i matured alot from the sec school me... still very immature but really i learn alot more, i learn and adjusted myself to some things classrooms do not prepare you for. cannot really say i dislike or like the way i am now, but i still miss the old days.

STUDIES
nth now, just come school everyday... do abit stuffs here and there and hang out with the girls or just sleep, that's all... peiwen and me now kinda not bad already lah, tho sometimes she and grace also close till push me aside but other than that, all is fine...

FRIENDS
recently just went mz place... i think it should be 2 days after auntie's bdae... the girls were all there yet i wasnt... kinda upset about it but i had no choice... after that when i oversleep my mrt stop and ended in tanah merah, i went mz house instead...

actually i kinda feel lonely, now that all of them are in tampines... on the mrt stop now, i drop off at bedok alone, i wait for bus at bedok inter alone... its not really convenient to meet at bedok inter with the girl who lives ard 10mins from inter, just as me who lives 7mins away from the interchange...

loneliness actually does not come from being alone. it comes from being alone, when you know you could have had someone by your side. ain this true? its really not easy getting that comfortable companionship, especially when people you care about are always so busy...

and i dunno whats wrong with me... i just dont want to get hurt again but i dont seem to be able to stick to my DONTS for not getting hurt. cos i called cher about when she's coming and stuffs. having given in and called her, i feel so irritated at myself that i attituded her... zzz... so we ended up quarreling...

but i also wanna prove, the things they always say, that she is dependent on me and stuffs, is bullshit... nobody is indispensible... for all the fanciful talks and advices people give whenever we quarrel, its all CRAP. she can just jolly well drop me off her world that easily. so of cos i gotta take the cue to keep the game going...

but im also really glad that bee is back... she always make me feel not so alone... cos i know no matter what she really understands me... that day when we went shoppingm, we were chatting, me asking her views on somethings and she updating me about her life...

she said all the everything i wanted to hear, all kinda based on last time reception and understangin... but it all feels so familiar... because no matter how much i change on the outside, my inside will never change... inside, im still me, no matter how much better i have trained and geared myself up for work or entertaining...

its just so comforting to know that bee will always care about me in the way i care for her and not let me down... thanks alot bee... on the other hand, i am kinda sad that im abit drifting apart with joy, because now we have much much lesser contact...

she's also been a very busy girl, in school stuffs, cca commitments and busy in bliss, hahas... hope she will always remain this happy... im so looking forward to tommorrow's shopping with her... i actually applied leave for it you know... 21 hrs of flexi leave to be applied, spread over a period of 10 weeks... >_<

WORK
im now arthur's god daughter... became quite some time ago le... but it was long after he appointed me to be trained as VIP server... im still damn stressed and sometimes when he addresses me arh girl in front of everyone i feel kinda paiseh but also happy at the same time...

but i also do not know what i ahve i done to deserve all this... everyone thinks i appear so close with him and that we are like so good with each other... him doting on me is so obvious but the thing is, i feel that everything is travelling at too fast a speed...

its like im caught in the current and cannot control things nor have tiome to see whats in front of me and behind me anymore...things just happen and go... so far i cried twice... its like people there, black jackets and stuffs, sometimes they really make me feel like im useless without huihui jie...

its not that i learn very slow or what, its just that im not trained...everyone see me VIP server, they envy me and say i must have worked very long and stuff... but no, i wasnt trained, din work long and im suddenly expected to be miss smarty pants and know it all... zzz...

anyway, i set up a new blog already... under construction, now, i gtg... so... TO BE CONTINUED

Wished She Was Loved ;

12/12/2006 09:01:00 AM

Tuesday, December 05, 2006


my beloved ones, so long since i've blogged... have just so much to say yet i cant find time to tell you guys... missed you all... thanks for not giving up on my blog just yet, lols... its gonna be a long entry, hence im setting a in a glance for my really busy darlings...

IN A GLANCE

friday
-worked v8
-felt overworked
-people there getting more selfish
-soe treats me differently
-new gal yun mei gets soe's attention

saturday
-went shopping with bee
-enjoyed it very much
-work at OPH gets me obssessed with it
-shock of being told that someone cares (ask me for more details)

sunday
-alot new stuffs within shin
-im rusty, got blamed for pple's mistakes
-ed was hot and cold
-sher remains nice to me, i miss her so...
-bee came n worked at OPH (her first job)

monday
-worked a lousy night
-worked normal tables
-spilled and dropped stuffs
-served bloody cheena pple, irritatingly choiced...zzz...
-saw huihui, missed her so...
-im getting so damn bloody reliant i hate myself

FRIDAY (01/12)

went to sch... as usual loh... from 8.30am to 6pm loh... then after that went v8 work... found myself working weekends for them again i guess... but its always shit work lah... cos fridays are VERY busy days....and they happen to be very SHORT handed...

so even if i reach early, i also cannot eat, cos i just hafta go out and help... cos there are like 2 new people out there, on a friday night with a short handed situation... lols... so i find myself doing two or three people stuffs...

super irritating... i feel so overworked... but at least this is something i can always handle with confidence so at least its not so bad... hahas...anyway, guess the people there getting more and more inconsiderate... like they dun really leave food behind for me...zzz...

SATURDAY (02/12)

meet up with bee in the morning till late noon... then worked at OPH. hahas... meaning banquets lah... hahas...
went marina square with bee... forgotten to tell her that its gonna be cold there... sorrie girl... and i promise to make time out for her... been not meeting her for too long too long le...

tho the closeness is there, i shall not take it for granted...at least haiz, i know i can dote on her with all my heart... unlike someone who sometimes i wanna be like the past and dote but i hafta hold back, cos i just dont wanna be hurt again... theres just so many ways a person can get hurt...

anyway, shopping there with bee was nice, tho she din manage to catch her soya ice cream, hahas... i only wished i have had more money with me then, so that we both din hafta hold back muich on anything... but we did find alot things to buy... but since it did not go with her prom... hahas... we din buy...

im still rather proud of myself for not spending on any shopping stuffs anyway... hahas... and i took a lot of pictures... bee! all the best to your prom yea? and i kinda really missed joy... long time like never contact with her le...sad to say... this days i always have had contact with bo liao people...

actually im turning lazee, i just respond when msged and spoken to... so this days are just all the bo liao guys contacting me... not to hao lian or what... but i really feel kinda no life... what i want is seriously not all this... my passion for working is so great i think i sux cos i cant control myself...

i lunge myself so deep in i cant see anything else anymore... the worst thing is that there is no one to hold me back... you know what... i always tell myself... what for i care about this about that? because i feel that no one else cares... its like im single, im free to be anything and who cares if im like overworking, if im nt so ladylike or what...

i ask the same questions so many times already... why would people even like a girl like me? for sleeping she can lose all erm posture and ladylike-ness, if i have had any to start off with... and i think i wanna cut down on my eating.,.. its scary now how my body can react tand show all the extra food i have been eating... i scare myself.

and suddenly someone tells me he cares, giving me the shock of the day...

SUNDAY (03/12)

worked shin from 12 till 5... supposed to start at 10 but i was just too tired to wake early and i just thought i should give myself a break... really gonna break down soon... in terms of health or mentally i dont know. its not really the running about so many places that makes me sick... its all the thinking and actions i have to do and think that makes me sick and tired i guess...hahas...

there were alot of new things to be updated... they changed menus, changed table numbers, changed POS system functions and there were a few more new people, good for ed who managed to hire more new people also... but sadly, all foreigners...

and ed framed me for a mistake others make... and i corrected mistakes for others, with the fear of being accused of it as my own... pathetic isnt it... this moment ed says he misses me and the other moment he blames me for others' mistakes... wth... haiz... was so sad and disappointed...

the nmore this place upsets me, the more unwilling i will be, to work. even tho there will be people there who treats me not bad... but it just pales in comparison to the other places... ed, do u really care about your branches so much...? how i wonder...

after that went OPH work nights...was backstabbed and pushed aboput ard by ALOT black jackets... i hate ex... bloody hell... damn sissy, pick on a girl like me who has to take on all the stress of serving the VIP table, meaning the bride and groom table one by one on my own...

please rmb i only worked there for a month or so only... and i've worked VIPs so far and only twice of normal tables to date... BJ (black jacket) 1 says this, BJ 2 says that and now, who am i supposed to listen to? and do 2 BJs hafta quarrel in front of me? wth... zzz...

working there sure is tiring man... mentally especially and sometimes the people there de temper just sucks...

VIP TABLE (MAIN TABLE) NORMAL TABLES
60 plates 60 plates
30 underliners 30 underliners
20 spoons 20 spoons
8 sets of serving gear 12 sets of serving gear
1 ladle 1 ladle
1 tea pot 7-9 napkins
1 tea pot heater 1 white napkin
2 candles 5 glass jugs
7-9 green napkins 1 or 2 metal jugs
1 white napkin 5 small trays
2 metal jugs 3 oblong trays
2 glass jugs
2 big trays
2 small trays
1 red wine

AND! be surprised! BEE CAME TO WORK WITH ME. her partner saisd she did well, but i know its very tough lah, not everyone can tahan work banquets de... so i understand her working once and not wanting to come again le... hahas...

she said arthur talk cocky, which i agree with all my heart lols... but after work he really super nice to me lah... hahas... to know more details can chat with me for it... far too private for a blog... lols...

MONDAY (04/12)

worked OPH after school... kinda half rushed there and found myself there at half an hour before seven and slowly took my time in preparing... came out and realised roll call was over... anyway, was assigned to one person two tables... damn sway de thing is i never have had experience with normal tables enough and i spilled while clearing stuffs ytd... siann...

cos i gt sch and jiaxi hols ma so i GOTTA arrive late and so was assigned normal tables and jiaxi gotta be teamed with my fav huihui jie jie... the VIP pro pro... lols... she was the one who taught me, as well as jiaxi loh... i really missed her, whenever i got bullied or pushed ard... so happened that sometimes those that dote on me nv work, i DIE...

well, at least so far, already found people who dote on me le, but equally so it is for jiaxi... and she hasnt offended ex... i see him work i siann diao... beginning thought he quite nice de... bloody hell... must hope hope hope he goes back to working restuarant...

you can never know how things can go after work... hahas...am i wrong to wanna share cab and wait time for supper cos i dun wanna rush for last train? am i really after saving the cab money but also because i wanted to have time with the seniors? hahas... >_<

btw, few days agio i cun rmb when, i chatted with smartie back again... and shin has this girl same name as him xia... whereas v8 now got new guy named joey also... talk about haunting memories... and OPH has this guy that resembles joey pattern... o hell... and his 18, studying in np... bee gt see him before... she asked...

why do you go for tall guys? it juts happened by chance can? and it was funny and scary... when they (arthur and guys) pointed out say i liked him, all cos of his shirt... i said... "wo xi huan ni de yi fu!" meaning " i like your shirt" and they said i like him... cos inside the phrase contains "wo xi huan ni" meaning "i like you" dots...

but he really very nice.. like when i cannot handle and there was this day when he wore a BJ, he helped me, i responded or replied something... then he say i act cute... then i say cute anot, lols... he looked at me in the eyes and then i turned away (act shy) cos i think he gonna say something nasty....

and know what ma? after sometime he says, "not bad lah, hai ting cute de lah" and walked away... "
meaning, not bad lah, still quite cute loh" and he asked why i turn my head away xia... LOLS. then i say is cos i expected something nasty... he say no lah, "mei you lah and walked back to his duties... AWWWW, LOLS"


hmmm, i know bee thinks and feels the guys talk and think dirty and ain afraid to show it...its her first time encountering such people... i met before so i know... but somehow i feel safe with them, cos i know they are all just talk, for people like david, when he comes up close...

he doesnt say anything, but that doesnt mean he doesn notice or observes... sickening... im so scared of him now... he must thinkk im ungrateful since he brought me in to work and now im like running away from him... whatever lah... since mui arh pa ensures that he wun do anything with him ard...

so many questions to ask, so many mixed up feelings...haiz...

Wished She Was Loved ;

12/05/2006 11:08:00 AM

Friday, December 01, 2006


WEDNESDAY

wed worked 7-10 for v8 cafe...was quite alright... had food to eat cos daniel saved for me... got soup to drink cos auntie mary saved for me... but the thing is, when i arrived, cannot eat... because it was busy at a okie level but there were 3 newcomers on ground...

food gets stuck and everything... everyone looked so stressed... and i felt like soe din like me or something already xia... i wonder why leh... zzz... and henry off that day so kinda abit sian... abit only... dont think so much...

on way to mrt station, met up with daniel... sat down there and talked, missed alot of trains... o my...i really missed talking like this... we talked about alot of things, updated each other, just like the old days... think now v8 all okie already....

daniel prob, ZQ is still a prob but at least we can WORK normally... henry is half half lah... but eventually he will understand we are like brither ans sister... which is for my case...anyway, he also going back to study soon le, in malaysia... after he makes enough money here so yea... hahas...

i wonder whether will i get another pay rise....

THURSDAY

meet up with bee, lynn and cher, go PS eat... can guess is cartel le right... damn, im kinda seriously broke and here i am, eating restaurants stuffs... i cant wait to get my pay... so that i can pay off my accumulating debts... shit man... since when i owe so many people so much money.... and since when did so many people owe me money and not pay... zzz...

anyway, it was a nice meeting,... and there was this despo girl keep asking me to help her with her projects... im still CONSIDERING... hey despo girl, you reading THIS? hahas... and beez got her dress already... so happy for her... was still cracking my brains of where to go... bee i look forward to shopping with u on saturday...

TO BE CONTINUED

Wished She Was Loved ;

12/01/2006 04:45:00 PM

Wednesday, November 29, 2006


MONDAY

came to school very unwillingly... because... it is the first day of TEP. 10 weeks of prison sentence, serving from 8.30am to 6pm daily. got give me things do still never mind... ask me come school and slack leh... i'd rather sleep loh...

and the worst thing is, govt slow... haven activate our cards... make us hard to enter the room loh... and opther teams all got things to do and can have senior briefiong them on what to do, we dont have. because team 4 was born just this semester, cos this semester got more students than usual so we are a NEW group...

and the people in my group so damn timid de... dun dare go out and eat or what de... super boring... hahas... lucky still gt msn... can pei me...

TUESDAY

tues had training at orchard parade hotel, banquet training... alot people turned up... i was late cos sch dismisses at 6pm...

WEDNESDAY

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/29/2006 10:57:00 AM

Tuesday, November 28, 2006


THURSDAY

went out with my girls... going along lynn's wishes, we went PS eat... cos lynn wanted to show bee HER cute Edward which i din think he was cute... but well, in those days, nobody thought J was cute too... but at least i think his still better than Edward in the looks department cos at least he doesnt look beng... hahas...

but lynn and me taste very different lah, so also cannot direct comparison... hahas... bee is pro, she has the ability to get thinner again... jialat xia... and with attachment starting, how do i ever have the time to meet her out and really fatten her up? im sorry, beez...

anyway, the day was quite nice loh... anyway, kinda made up with cher already but things will never be the same again with the girl who doesnt apologise and the girl who gets hurt too many times... the worst thing of all is that, thew proven fact is that im no longer needed or as indispensible...

see le then realised i miss mz and beez as much... hahas... dumb jiajin supposed to come but i guess she died and MIA-ed... for the dunno how many-th time... ZZZ! and i realised my camera doesnt have flash... gotta buy external flash or try something funny... lols...

FRIDAY

worked shin... 2-11pm... was quite happy that day cos all the fun and nice people worked... but i was not really on good terms with people with authority... hahas... as in the assistant managers and bosses... of all people i only like kelvin... cos he very smiley and also greet people with respect and courtesy... he never talks in a proud manner also...

anyway, missed v8... guess thats where my heart is eventually... cos i will always long ffor the fact that people there dote on me...

SATURDAY

worked v8 in the morning and worked banquet at night... worked at v8 till 3pm only... ate chicken baked rice there, shopped around a little... called mz, wanting to talk to her and she said she was in bugis... so after ther friends left her, we meet... and i bought a third pair of court shoes from seiyu...

but who knows, when i trial it with shin bottoms, it was a failure... cos can tell that they are slip ins. hahas... the bottoms not baggy nor loose enough to cover... and i tell myself i want new formal dresses for banquets and also new sport shoes from Giordano for working at v8! hahas... PAYDAY HURRY COME ARH!

banquet was rather nice, tho being nice, i stood out abit too much and felt abit left out.... but told you all le, new work place, its always the guys that accept you first, then you see whether you are lucky enough to be able to join the girls and bitch around... as in gossip around lah...

i dun mind just hanging out with guys but being a girl, its better if i hang around with the girls and strive goodily well with the guys, you get what i mean... hahas... thats why i always tell anyone, whn enter a new work place, pacify the girls first cos the guys are easy people to get with... lols... cos girls hang in clicks, guys hang out with practically anybody... hahas...

and i worked for VIP table on my own, without huihui leh...hahas... it was a wedding banquet again... hahas... and was super wishing i do not have to serve the normal tables in any instance, cos i already got used to serving VIPs le... hahas...

went to watch movie after work.. damn tiring and i reached home at 5 plus... watched the movie, "battle of wits" dont tell anyone but i fell asleep halfway... and got weoken up by huge explosion... zzz... even tho i said abot waking me if i sleep... i pushed Arthur away when he tried to wake me, asked him not to disturb... lols...

(arthur is the operation manager, the guy i get my money from after work and spend it away with... zz... the 36yr old uncle...who lied to me abt having a shot gun 19yr old son... and he picked the wrong guy to lie, cos he far better looking than his "son" already and the age do not match... hahas...)

SUNDAY

today was the supposedly temple banquet that im supposed to work at for stewart and meet brandon... but somehow, it got cancelled... hahas... hence i worked for tung lok banquet again loh... hahas... but this time, not good... i gotta work with JULIAN, normal tables.... omigosh... machiam like lightning strike me lah... i know it will not be easy de loh...

cos he liek to scold me dumb in the BAd mannered way... and i know nuts about working normal tables... cos for VIP is we portion every dish and serve... and there are other things to take note andf worry about... but i also enjoy the previlges of working VIP tables liao loh...

cos all the black jackets will come and help here help there cos thats what they are for, you know... hahas... black jackets are the captains... hahas... so in the end, half heartedly and super unwillingly, asked julian for things to do and everything loh... dumb! he never explain, really just ask me do... zzz...

P.S. julian is a dark tanned skinny 15 yr old who has worked for half a yr there and is bad mannered, smokes and is proud... zzz...but sometimes he can talk fun too lah, i wun like totally dicriminate against him butm, he is rather annoying you know... with that character of his...

i made a mistake in distributing bowls... i distribute to the guests as their personal bowls instead of putting it on lady "susan"... (lady susan is what you call the spinning plate on wedding banquet tables, susan is pronounced as susan but its not spelled as such btw...)

and upon realising my mistake, julian got super angry and scolded me afterwards for being such a PIG. ARGH... almost wanted to quit lah, i know its my mistake but i ain old bird leh, uncle... zzz... huihui not ard also cos she working VIP... poor me... where have all the good people gone to...

and there was this guy thats quite lame, its like everytime i work, i see new people... i wonder how long must it take for me to have seen all their staffs... hahas... i was carrying heavy things at some time, then i needed someon to help me open the door... this guy stood in front of the door, made the gesture to open, then he stopped and ask, " whats your name, how old are you, got bf anot? "

i was like diao diao diao three lines three lines swear drop sweat drop... and i replied... i only wanted you to open the door for me... hahas... and so i went out loh... i guess if he wanted to know all this, ask in a better way and not when people work and sweat outside lah, mr CHINA black jacket... zzz...

afterwards, was damn tired already... AND... went for supper just to share cab also... guess mummy must be feeling so sad... ot seeing me reach home before she has to go sleep... but i kinda have no choice... banquets dun end early and i dont even have time to catch last train or what... too late to even catch also... zzz...

TO BE CONTINUED

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/28/2006 10:25:00 AM

Saturday, November 25, 2006





 Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 03:15:00 AM



it says on the cup, "there are many kinds of love, one of them is tolerance."
"ai you hen duo zhong, qi zhong zhi yi jiao bao rong." PSA lunch banquet... this shows their menu, the dessert, tea cup, water glass...
the day i was forced to wear skirt... hahas...
wedding banquet de table... bride n groom table... the chairs got rose de leh! so mei can... the table napkin holder even more nice lah! its a flower with a swirling stem like that of a straw... cool! Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 03:09:00 AM



what i ate for dinner... the fried rice at PS food court is seriously nice... hahas...

see what i mean? hahas...
how cute the way the lightsigns outstand anything else... lols...
the dessert i ate at cartel... and their service seriously CMI... tho cher n lynn were nuts abt one guy each there... hahas... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 03:03:00 AM



painting only, you will think right? nope, is OIL PAINTING. got diff de, got the different layers of paint de... hahas...
there i show you the layers... can tell already ma? hahas...

range of flowers for sale just below the painting... all were rushed shots... cos i did not know whether cams were allowed inside shop... oops... >_< Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 03:00:00 AM



peiwen, huiyu, yi yong and me were in school canteen, food junction, aka FJ. peiwen gt bored and started taking candid ugly shots of huiyu as revenge, cos huiyu deleted the those oeiwen took last time after ur formal role play... hahas...

im innocent but i got caught also... zzz... i swear i din know she was taking... hahas...
huiyu.... abit not in time to dodge... hahas... blurry!
yi yong de sha xiao...
there? i said i din noe already... also dunno what i trying to do BUT my eyes were slits! dammit... how sad lah... ='( Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 02:56:00 AM



cher in background, beez and lynn in front! focus? duh, the xmas "trees" lah!
ain the lights nice? i wonder why mui cam no flash de... zzz... external flash for offer anyone?
lynn, cher, beez, me, joy behind... poor gal gt hidden... hahas...
tink this pic is nicer cos can see everyone liao... but i see pple acting cute! alamak whole body gets uncomfotable liaoooo.... lols... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/25/2006 02:52:00 AM

Wednesday, November 22, 2006


night time lights! yue ye yue mei li! do u agree? hahas ....
e pic e boss insisted on taking for me when he saw me and auntie mary taking pics... -.-''' see e forced SMILE? hahahas
day time lights! erm see any lights ma? hehehe...
somehow... me and auntie mary blocked all the lights... lols... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/22/2006 01:41:00 AM



S$1000000 Question: what do normal people do when they buy a new camera?
S$1000000 Answer: they start taking pics of themselves... hahahahas...
was so surprised my red highlights from a millenium ago showed up! hahahas...
did u notice?
well, this is not MY room... hahas... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/22/2006 01:31:00 AM



recntly been quite busy with sleeping and stuffs.... anyway, i received a mega sized complaint from some Ms Chua that my blog is all words and no pics.... it isnt that i dont have, just that i dont have time to load it you know... anyway, im reader friendly, so i shall post some pics ba... hahahahahahas...

MONDAY

went sch for proj... had dental in morning. was late for project meeting. was made to write out the whole script for another project as a result, or so i think... and i took out my braces liao... but had to wear retainers... dammit... cant speak as well as braces xia...

braces felt better than this man... like back to the teeth mould days... super terrible... tho it looks like nothing on the surface... and before eating must remove, after eating must put back... morning must brush it, night must wash it... zzz... machiam denture xia... zzz...

WEDNESDAY

told mummy i need reach school by 11 or 12. she mistook it as wake me by 11 or 12... obviously, got hated by group members but they kinda diam diam cos the script was all written by me... do i ahve a choice... sent them the scriot then they nv say anything also...

i mean also me sway to leave 2hrs away from school you know... hahas... today went dental, return home, watched bleach, went for work... ate chicken rice! good auntie mary! that day said i wanna eat it and she cooked it since she knew i today coming... hahas...

and shawn actually bought me bubble tea, his treat leh! lols... i just say say de... *innocent look*
hahahahahahahas... but today stoopid henry attitude me xia... but i think is cos he unhappy cafe cut his OT hours lah... cos full timer OT hor, even more than 1.5 de leh...








kinda looking forward to tml yet dread tml... haiz... anyway, i recently fell in love with this song... not a new one, but a nice one... here are the lyrics...

HOME
MICHAEL BUBLE

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home
Mmmmmmmm

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Babe I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
'Cause I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
That this is not your dream
But you always believed in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m doneI gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOB03kAFLr0
this is the video... hahas...

UTADA HIKARU
HEAR ME CRY (FINAL FANTASY)

You couldn't say
Needed someone new
You actually thought
Deep inside I knew

Can you tell me how can you say
Why this should suffice
You passed me by
And your heart's as cold as ice
(You passed me by)

Did you see me cry
(Did you ask yourself why)
Did you see me cry
(Did you ask yourself how)
Can you hear me cry
(Did you ask yourself)
Will we ever grow apart

You couldn't say
Needed someone new
And you actually thought
Deep inside I knew

I wonder where we will go
Will we be the same
(You passed me by)
I laugh inside I think of you
And the love we made
(You passed me by)

Tell me why this should suffice
I hold you through the night
Now will I let it go
Soon I'll let it go

Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself why)
Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself how)
Can you hear me cry
(Will you ask yourself)
Will we ever grow apart

You, I'll stand by your side
I'll be there for you
(You passed me by)
You, I'll stand by your side
Please just do me right
(You passed me by)

You, I'll stand by your side
I'll be there for you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtDrYIt4us4
this is the video for this song... nice... i like... tho v sad de melody... haiz...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/22/2006 12:23:00 AM

Sunday, November 19, 2006


i have a desire to soar up, far and high. but i also do realise i lack wings.

THURSDAY

on thursday, i was supposed to meet cher after school and go shop all the items we yearned like mad. i was so looking forward to thursday bcos i was really itching to shop and needed the items urgently. know what? she left her phone at home, after msging me saying she had to work. now even a sorry except a "sian" inside her msg as an "apology."

i almost scolded mz mum when she picked up the phone, thinking its her. lucky i din cos auntie did not deserve it. i called cartel, thinking that i should go down and scold her, cos i was really damn angry. why did she have to do this to me? if wanna work, cant i work too?

hello? i got 3 places to work at leh... and each is higher earning? if i were not to work bcos i dated her and she put me plane cos she went to work and left me stranded like a mega mega idiot, i think i lost out more right. wth. i guess thats what frens like her are for.

saw loti on msn and complained and she offered to pei me, tho her work ends at 6pm she must be rather tired. its all abt effort, cant you see? i dont even get a call from the person who stood me up cos i dont think she been working continuosly for 2 days without going home, without access to her phone.

hence, im pretty sure she jolly well thinks im dead. and i need to do my projects but i do not have a thumbdrive to use. cos i lend her mine and its not an extra anyway. am i dumb or nuts. i must be retarded.i really do not know what to do already. loti says she's dependent on me.

but if thats really the case, why doesnt she need to at least call me once every two days? i might be dead but she doesnt know, unless mz or who tells her! hahas... even mz also sensed im unhappy and she's the cause of it. great. i cant imagine how she passes her day without thinking or recalling anything to do with me cos i cant and i hate myself for that.

anyway, enough about people who live in this world to hurt me when i just wanted to be there for them. so anyway, lynn and loti and me went tamp, eat Hans and shopped around for all we needed. thanks girls. din noe what would i have done without you girls... cos i really needed to get mui top... =D

i need to get mui camera and it was not bought as promised. ha, tell me why man. so anyway, i decided to postpone buying it for as long as possible. but im gonna get it before mid dec anyway, so as to capture all the lovely images! all the gatherings! haiz...

FRIDAY

went back school to write out script for tml's role play ica. it was tiring cos i did not have enough sleep, rushing projects and of cos, watching Bleach in between... im officially hooked, all thanks to mui brother. he siao eh, he watched until 100 plus episodes already and passed on the disease to ME. poor me...

Bleach is really touching for all the stories in the episodes... as far as i rmb, i watched till episode 11 already and for all the episodes when a story comes to an end after explaining the story of a Hollow, mui tissue box would be halved... hahas...

this anime (as corrected by miss joey) is about shinigamis referred as soul reapers in the anime, destroying Hollows and the story of the Hollows and the story of those they harmed. Hollows are souls with the chain of Faith connecting their chest to the human world broken, causing them to become monsters having no love and only thinks of devouring other souls de souls.

Hollows are much stronger than souls, are invisible, unless to people who high level of spritual senses and have their faces hidden behind a ghastly white, hard skull mask. they come in alot shapes and sizes, powers and tricks up their slevee. after saying so much, i guess its worth a watch ain it? hahahahas...

TODAY after script writing and planning, i went to work for David. he owns the Club Chinosis at Orchard Parade Hotel. its a very posh place and the restaurant functions on the fusion of chinese and western culture and settings. cool. you should have seen their glasses, super BIG can. hahas...

wore their unifrom and went onto the bus for sending us to the Istana. working the function in which George Bush comes for dinner you see. damn impressive de saying wor... hahas... but you know what? waited outside the security check point for abt an hour before we can go in for they have not affirm our identities... damn strict xia...

the place is very big, got slope, and alot gardens all around. there were alot of armed guards around. but i would not have noticed the guns if David had not pointed them out for me. lols... to satisfy your curiousity, David is a 24yr old guy, slightly on the short side but super fit if you get what i mean (the kinda guy thats super capable of bear hugs lah i should say) and the best i want from him, is his rosy cheeks.

wth, red by nature... if it were mine, i would not require blusher anymore, lols... but i recently also haven been applying it lah, cos i think its kinda unnatural... hahas... if only i dont have dark eye rings! then i would not need to put on any make up at all and not scare others while feeling super inferior... sad le lah... sadded...

anyway, back to topic... everyone seems so experienced! im so green, lols... and a guy named "i din catch his name, he said suan le so i call him suan le" guessed im 19! what audacity! im only 18, you idiot...
and his 15 lah... i hate having younger peeps ard me can... make me feel so old...

if not then i always mix around with uncles... make me feel so despo... but i do know they are the ones who can show me things and teach me stuffs that guys our age cant. David says he wants me to see and learn, and then work for him... Brandon works for Stewart, the guy working for an agency...

David works for his boss, the big boss of Tung Lok company... you know Tung Lok ma? "tong le ji tuan"... 20 branches internationally... and i saw all their bosses today! hahahahahas... and i saw Wu Chuo Dong also! alamak... hahas... and his wife, George Bush and alot of big shots and ang mohs... hahas...

machiam like movei like that! before movie, they stand in an area, talking, conversating with each other... while i serve them, wine and juices in glasses on trays, erm simply put, cocktail party like that lah... hahas... then after which they dine a 5 course dinner, lasting around 45 mins cos must minus the 15 mins speech, in a room with live band playing and singer singing while struming the guitar independently... cool!

it was really an eye opener for me... first time leh... and this guy that works in the restaurant while calefaring tonight (the 15yr old guy) keep scolding me stoopid! walau eh... a 15yr old scold a 18yr old... where can like that de... angry xia... as in the qi gei way lah cos we squabbling, not quarreling... if you get what i mean...

anyway, realised how lousy i was lah... guess this industry everyone started out earlier den me... very sian... he worked high class straight while i had to work my way up... like from cafe, to restaurant and then finally something more in touch with the hospitality sector... hmmm...
better buck up... but im so thankful i get to learn so many things.. =D and im scared i might really be getting a little ***** lah... hahas... or maybe its just that all the ****** seem so much better ba... and they really are i guess...

MISTAKES MADE
1. carried too many glasses on my cocktail tray
(heavy and no need for that)

2. made too much noise
(shoes and arranging of cutlery)

3. asking guests to be seated before BIG shots came in
(i was asked to ask if you get what i mean)

4. crossed over guest when distributing cutlery
(ain supposed to do that)

5. gave ladies n gentlemen cutlery by status
(wastes time and is not necessary)

THINGS LEARNT
1.always serve from guests' right

2.cocktail is for show, a few glasses will do

3.do not cross over guest when distributing cutlery

4.food should be served, lowest ladies, higher ladies, lowest gentlemen, higher gentlemen, highest lady, highest boss. (high low in terms of rank or status)

5.after asking whether guests wans chinese tea, one shld take off the cover and clear, OR just place the cover against the tea cup stand. (this is so that the person pouring tea knows who wants tea.)

SATURDAY

went shopping at J8 with joy... after nt seeing her for the whole of her exam week... hahas... i waited one hr... cos i arrived too early and she reached abit late.... hahas... super long journey de 53 bus! lols...

i walked ard... saw a few things that i want n bought it when she came... hahas... and! we were wearing the same shirt (planned) and bag(unplanned)!!

we ate at ajisen... hmmm... J8 ajisen sucks... food wise, okie okie only... service wise, cannot make it... chefs, uncles... service staff, kinda dao... guys okie okie, gals cannot make it... lols...

work at night was nt good... upon reaching tio gan liao... siann... cos of schedule thingy... cos R din noe i going beforehand tho boss ed knew... but e main point to me is that you lack people i come despite anything, ain that gd enuff already?

whats with the damn schedule fuss? actually i do not believe in the dividing zone way of handling the place... cos the places, gets filled up part by part, correct. but when we do rounds, we walk ard. not abt e same zone... zzz...

and when you walk past and customers call, you hafta serve de what... so whats with the allocating zone thingy...? its better to stick to positions like sashimi collar, grill collar, kitchen collar, ordertakers, setters and clearers, tea refillers, private room handlers... by tasks, rather than area...

anyway, in the beginning was so pissed off that i almost quitted on the spot... bcos you can say i dont work good enough but you cannot be biased against me. cos if thats e case, i wun even wanna do anything abt it loh... and what can i do?

well, anyway, if you not gonna dote on me, its fine. im not a magnet anyway but at least treat me right for my effort or what... now e old birds call me muscle woman, the guys call me queen of clearing...

i reply saying, i do not have good looks, i am not cute, hence the only thing i can do is to smile as often and do more than others to prove my worth... cos we cant deny having gd looks or being cute paves a smoother way ain it? and dun call me muscle woman... very nan ting leh... lols...

and our mr charming changed targets already... im sick of changes. CHANGES SUCKS BIG TIME. dunno what other words to express how i feel le... argh.

and i must learn that work is work... colleagues are colleagues, boss is boss and i must not expect too much of either... haiz... learn learn learn, you idiot. bakado.

SUNDAY

work today at v8 was nice... ytd talked ABIT to boss ed and we better alrdy... but well... nv as good as before for sure but... aiya... and he asked me work today morning but i agreed v8 12-10 le ma...

but in e end i got msg winner lah, say i go at 5pm can anot... then she say she lack people also... so i just msg boss ed say i cant le... so i kinda irritate both parties lah... haiz... whatever lah...

and today mabel come work xia... zzz... she weird lah... and i realise maybe daisy is not s simple as she seems... haiz... she so changeable...
poor soe and me i suddenly feel.... we both are victims of her changes...

hahas...but spending time with auntie mary has always been good... have been super happy during work today... hahas... except that henry is sick and that some silly mistake today was indirectly caused by me... siann....

so e kitchen winds turn this way and that way lah... but i noe they treat me much better than other kitchens i guess... today gt 2 gals come for interview... wah honoured xia...

suddenly all e full timers cun be bothered... ask me interview and handle them... lols... of cos was pleased lah... but do rmb e case i worked longest for all outside staff... hahas... if only susan was still around... our pillar... haiz...

today i scalded my hand quite badly... felt the burning for at least 2hrs afterwards... siann... so thats how it feels like... no injuries or what but just skin feeling limp and cannot touch any hot stuffs... zzz... haiz...

so hard to find a good working place le... i think im too emotional for WORK PLACES le and the one to suffer shld be me in the end, taking so many things, some for learning purposes, some for emotional reasons...

but the talk with boss ed did remind me i was one of his first waitresses, who went thru all the courses... together with him, started working the moment the business is open... haiz... and i realise...

that all the concerns he said and i felt previously was really blinded by my pissed off at manager that i really decided to quit. and the fact that everyone just worked... no joke... etc...

i guess its really the "you laugh, whole world laughs with you", "you cry, the world spins on its own still"... siann...

i freakingly hate it when people attitude me. other than being emotional, im moody... so dont mess with me or you will get worse... i can dont care who needs me anymore if im not appreciated... i can just stop working and rest or whatever...

work all your staffs to death, they will not be happy either... worse still, dont provoke me so much till i say i will come for work and not come... hope nobody shall compel me to become this kinda person... yet.

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/19/2006 11:34:00 PM

Tuesday, November 14, 2006


hardly rarely felt happy these days... dont ask why cos i dunno either... but ytd talking crap with bincho and mashi maro made me rather happy... tho they bincho kept asking dumb questions like "i wanna ask you a sensitive question... how do you make sashimi salad?" so i said vege below, sashimi by the side displayed out and seasoning on top...

then he said im cute cos i answered... nt cute lah... ask questions dont want pple to answer de meh... and more lame questions like, another sensitive question and asked... " what do you do if you find out toilet no toilet paper?" hahas...

so i answered say i always check to see if it got, if got then i enter de... which is very true but if its packed then of cos no choice to check lah... hahas... and mashi maro was asking me where i live and keep mixing up the place tho i typed out whole address... zzz...

anyway, today got woke up by a call from faizal... wanted to intro job to me... jialat xia... i go one event nia then job offers come from all over... now there's one for thurs and one next coming sunday for freelance jobs and then office job from faizal and another from teddi... alamak...

think anyone lack of job can come find me okie? i gt tons of lobang... only no time to work... cos got projects and stuffs coming up... i must not stress myself too much if not sure screw up de... hahas... stoopid cher de fault... now i want eat pizza hut de garlic bread liao... ji dan gao... hahas...

was talking to ed's friend online... uncle as he might seem, but he really understands what i feel and he can even put what i think into words when i could not have put it better into words myself... here the conversation goes...


A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
wa lau
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
y sound sound so sad
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
u not going back to vivo to work liao mah

™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
gg back ba...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
dun wanna give up so easily..
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
but i also dunno how much ed cares abt me...

A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
thats the spirit
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
mayb too dispensible liao
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
hahas

A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
that guy is like that one la
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
me go le he can always hire another one de ma
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
hahas

A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
he seldom show his true feeling
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
anyway u shd have mroe confidence with urself
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
u r more than capable for this job
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
further more u once told me u like this line
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
on top of that u r not working there becos of the pay
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
so the more u shd stay on and work wat
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
i think ur bosses are all nice people

™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
tats y...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
but now they start to turn nt nice...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
and ur right...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
i do feel im da cai xiao yong..
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
u get what i mean?


™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
i work chinese banquets...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
i earn 7 an hr leh...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
if i work for money i wun stay le loh..
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
long time ago i can see liao
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
but it seems like pple there v work based...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
if u nv work they dun care much abt u de...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
but hols i can i work almost everyday
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
but now i where can ?
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
den cant blame de ma...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
im full time student, nt full time waitress...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
shermaine also cun stand them liao...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
and even kitchen aunites also leaving...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
cos its unfair inside n outside...
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
u get what i mean?
™MiSs RaiNiEtInG™ ...(。◕‿◕。) says:
hahas


A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
if u ask me
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
work is work
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
if u think that this place is not treating u well enough
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
then i think u shd move on lor
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
frankly i do not know u for long
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
but over the past few meetings i can see tat u like this line
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
and i also know that with ur kind of service u can serve in better place
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
so if there is a better place outside that can pay u better
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
my advice for u is to move on
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
frankly u do not owe them anything
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
wat i think u miss most are the early days when u all fight on together as a team
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
and the friendship that u gals and guys and build up over the past month
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
that is something that u feel that u cannot let go
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
i might not be rite
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
but when it comes to a time tat u start questioing abt whether is it worth staying to work for them
A BIG THANK YOU to ALL THE GOOD GUYS & GALS that TOOK GOOD CARE of ME in TOWN OFFICE says:
i tink it is time liao lor








what to say? i also miss the tired but happy face me... for now, that place holds disappointment, hope and troubles... also dunno how to explain... or rather i dont want admit the feelings im feeling for there ba... hahas... and im recently hooked to this song by cyndi, huang hun xiao... dask's dawn...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57724TOF-lE

go watch the video ba... and listen to the lyrics... nice...



another video in which ronald macdonald intro me de is rather cute i think... by hossan leong... hahas... abt singapura de... go watch if ur feeling bored or moody, just like me! hahahas...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWmLAui6OOw

hahas... enjoy! till next blog entry... hahas...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/14/2006 02:34:00 PM



THURSDAY

it was my only off day for the whole week... i went out with cher... went to her house after school and accompanied her to eat at compass point with jt and alvin... they said they dun mind coming along... so yea... after that we went cher house... collect her things...

and i had to rush down to shin to take shatec test... took cab down... alamak... no cab want me cos i wasnt wearing skirt and the cab that took me was a uncle that nv go vivo city before... *faints* and he took half an hr to fetch me there... almost same time as mrt but like erm 6 or 7 times more ex... wth...

now i hate to rely on taxis... they now same time as trains but haiz... waste my time... esp money cos equally ex... wth... the test was alright... im not so pro at the written test as there were some pauses here and there...

the napkin test, was brillant... i totally totally forgot how to fold my napkins can? alamak... but he guided me along loh... and in the end his overall assessment of my practical testing and questioning was a PASS. there is only pass and fail lah... and he wrote comments as CONFIDENT. hahas...

rushed back cher house...lost my way and got to layar... wth... so meet her inter with my bags and stuffs... know what? left my cosmetic bag at her house... genius... so rushed back to get it, while fearing her sister home already... then run for bus...

i nv tried running for bus, seeing it at bus stop A picking up pple, run all the way to bus stop B just to catch it there... my first time xia... lols... on bus was talking talking emotional topics... i hate to tear on bus... even if its in the eyes rolling also dont like... hahas...

anyway, had a sakura dinner wth loti, suyee and shu xian... was so tired that i went home before chatting with them... if i can fall asleep during dinner, now, that really is seriously tired, you know... hahas... and i really like their fruit punch lah... hahas...

FRIDAY

had no school... so was intending to work spilt shift but gt arranged at 2pm instead... but i fell asleep and reported for work abit late... tho tired, but i was heart aching the dollars i lost during the late hours and hours i would have earned should i have worked from morning onwards... anyway...

work was alright, tho shermaine was not there... and everyone was lively and chatty... something that is lacking in v8 now... hahas... so i was actually quite happy that day... hahas.. if i din rmb wrongly... but one mistake...

i hit ed too hard already... when he cursed at his own takeaway counter... i felt bad and apologised afterwards... but i somehow already feel like we are different... no longer that close... maybe its just his boss status shining thru or that, he doesnt need me that much anymore... and the bond is some how broken... tell me...how...?

SATURDAY

working chinese banquet at expo... wanted to find someone to pei me eat... so asked mz... she arrived super late... and we ate together... after that we took cab down expo hall 3... big event... shining glasses... hahas... nice... and i was made zone ic... meaning i had a number of pple under me...

and pls rmb its only my first time working banquets... and im working a leading position... stressed leh... but i get to play with the mike...walkie talkie tingy! hurrays! hahas... its fun... and happy when pple reply... esp when the place so noisy... hahas...

the plates are all so heavy... the trays are so big... i have that feeling that everyone's looking... cos im a young girl, carrying so much things, wearing a tie (the servers wear bow tie i wear tie)
and im always on the move...

others slowly guide me along... and i monkey see monkey do... cos brandon wasnt really that kinda teaching person... so i learnt more on my own more of less and from the bosses and instructors... cos i ASK. hahas...

the dinner went quite smoothly, i say quite... cos got this girl who wore wrong shoes to work and cannot walk throughout the dinner... so she wasnt a great help, yea? sian... but at least the guys were willing to carry loadsa heavy stuffs for me... while the girls half try their best...

after majority of customers left, we had to clear table cloths, seat covers, glasses, rubbish in floor, cutlery on floor... tiring and heavy xia... i worked till whole body ache xia... and now i got three blue blacks... one on knee...one on wrist... one more on the left heel "egg"... really really painful i say...

my feet were hurting like mad i mean it and we had to try to get all the chairs into the storage area... tiring xia... and i paid for the cab, having to land last.. sian... but i told the cab driver i wanna get to 7-11 buy food cos i was damn hungry...

he said he would wait for me, encouraging me by saying its all on company expenses... lols... hahas... so he waited while i bought alot of food... ALOT. three types of microwave stuffs, one chocolate, one big bag of mix and match and strawberry milk tea and large gulp's ice lemon tea... pro hor...

and i went home, ate and fell asleep on sofa for a while and gpt ready for bed...

SUNDAY

was really late for work... worked 2om but went for 6pm slot and was still late and reached shin ard 6.30pm leh... im too much le right? hahas... cos thought i forget tell mummy what time i need to wake up...

but at night, she told me that she asked me in the morning but i was really not awake and i had super dark eye rings that scared her... can imagine ma? really is "your mother see le also scared"... hahas... she said i answered her im not working and called ou byebye to a friends... sleep talk!

work was bad... dont really remember why now but i was really thinking of quitting lah... so after work, was so sad that i cried behind the restaurant... in front of vivo city' night view ... sad case hor... and of all pple! lamley, aka lamely walked out to smoke i guess...

he said you crying izzit? dont cry leh... then i just say i never, take my bag and walked away... he don chase or what lah... zzz... he surely doesnt know how to console a girl lah... zzz... and to think the so strong me crying... ha ha ha ha ha... joke of the year... started to worrie he will tell all around...

MONDAY

worked spilt shift today... so tired... lazee to climb outta bed... went to work... heard from beer that few days ago they were drunk due to william's bdae and that photos were taken of drunk people and that lamley was made to answer some questions which he answered... omigosh... stoopid beer...

no matter how also dun want tell me what happened while lamley, obviously, told beer the issue that i cried... jerk! today was quite relaxed... even the night... maybe is enough staffs or whatever ba... erm and yea today got new girl... veronica... we call her veron...

she came together with R... so hahas... sure biased liao le de... and she got prior experience and she is a full timer at that... sure stuck up liao... and her character is really stuck up... just come in like want to show me she super pro like that...then let her pro show loh...

i mean you come new place, behave like a new comer and people will be more willing to teach you things, behave stuck up-ly... people dont tell you extra things... and mui blue blacks hurt the whole day you know... shit lah...

and today really gotta know that alot people will be leaving... sadded le lah... matches the thing that alot people unhappy or dont hafta stay lah... i hate it when i get attached to people and they leave... sian... and i caught auntie zhuang crying today...

omigosh... i hate it when i see people like aunties cry... sommore she so nice de.. will chat with me then also very polite... always do her own things... and i always see her kenna bullied de... she work is for fun... she gt maid at home... is home too bored... ke lian xia...

think she quit le also good lah... eave this place good... ed off today... hope he use the time to be with his wife... hahas... but sad thing is, he wants to maintain a boss subordinate relationship with us... no family no more... hahas... time to go...

im not the type to boss here boss there then after work ed here ed there... i am me... i dont change... and i dont want to get close to any guy there... bcos im not interested and they all smoke... ZZZ.

in a week, at least got 4 or 5 times i get asked why i do not have a bf.. simple... i want a good one... nt a perfect one but a good one... one i dont hafta worrie about when im not with him, one that can really be by my side...happy or sad... and one that interests me... very diff arh? hahas...

aybe it really is ba... and i dunno what age he shoud be limited at... hahas...orh yea and that veron guessed im 22 when she herself is 21.. wth really wanna slap her already loh... which blind of urs tell you i look like 22? wth...!

NEWS UPDATE

lazee and dont want to update bcs family blues... make myself tired every night and sleep better then facing it... papa and mummy quarreling... this time really very serious... got third party even... talking about divorce... who takes who...

did not blog it down cos dont want ALL my friends to worrie... only a few close ones know... just in case i need to stayover or something you know... hahas... but its good now that they made up, hence me telling you guys now... tho mummy refuses to tell me how they made up... hahas...

now, after work, i am very tired and has no interest to even care abt ICA1 now.. nights pple... its already 4am in the morning...omigosh...imma ZOMBIE... a tired unwanted zombie... nights people... shall update when im free or feel like it again... zzz...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/14/2006 12:40:00 AM

Thursday, November 09, 2006


joy, this is from and for you...

IN THE PAST 24HOURS HAVE YOU:
1) Cried: yes
2) Wore Jeans: yup, cos its part of mui uniform for v8.
3) Met someone: the crowd counts? or friend? i did both...
4) Done laundry: nope.
5) Went Hungry: yea. thats what work is kinda about actually...
6) Talked on the phone: yea, im a social animal...
7) Said I love you: no and haven for a long time.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
8) Yourself: most of the time
9) Your friends: yes.
10) Tooth Fairy: only read abt it.
11) Destiny/ Fate: with all my heart...
12) Ghosts: yes i do...
13) UFO: nt interested...

FRIENDS AND LIFE:
14) Do you ever wished you had another name?: no. rain is good enough for me...
15) Do you like anyone?: of course!! alot of people actually... more than my dislikes...
16) Which one of your friends acts most like you: most arh... hard to decide... each has similiarities, hence goody friends ma...
17) When you cried the most who was there: the mother.
18) Whats the best feeling in the world?: to be doted on.
19) Whats the worst feeling in the world?: rejection, social failures...
20) What time is it now?: 2.38am on a thursday morning

WHICH IS BETTER:
21) Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate.
22) Coke or pepsi: coke.
23) Love or LUST: love.

YOUR PICK:
24) Mac or KFC: foldover from mac, ILT and chicken from KFC. BOTH please. hahas...
25) Single or group dates: im alrght with both actually... depends on the guy more ba...
26) Adidas or Nike: nike.
27) Lipton Tea or Nestea: lipton.
28) Cauppucino or coffee: neither... i dont like caffeine...

YOU:
29) smoke: nt even over my dead body...
30) Curse: as in scold severly or scold vulgarities? more of e 1st, lesser of the 2nd of cos...
31) Take a shower: definitely. duh...
32) Have a crush: nope...
33) Think you've been in love: been misled, yes...
34) Like school: depends on the mood of tt day.
35) Want to get married: at correct time, with correct person, correctly...
36) Think you're a health freak: if i say yes i guess pple who know me will die of laughter... hahas...

IN THE PAST MONTH:
37) drink alcohol: yea... friends, work, chocolate...
38) Gone to the mall: yes yes yes.
39) Been on stage: nope.
40) Eaten sushi: yes, one of my fav food types...
41) Been dumped: nope. haven been in my life...
42) Gone skating: no... you wanna teach me ma?
43) Dyed your hair: no. does highlight count?
44) Changed into who you want to be: nv been able to shine...
45) I love: numbing myself, being honest to self...
46) I hide: from guys. whats wrong with me...
47) I miss: the feeling of real happiness and being doted by people...
48) I need: an exciting fulfiling life...

anyone who wanna do this is welcome to... =)

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/09/2006 02:09:00 AM

Tuesday, November 07, 2006


P. pain and plasters starts with P. hahahas...


SUNDAY

supposed to work 10-5pm on sunday... however dummy me, woke up late and reached work place at 10.30am... after which due to serve feet pain that threatened to handicap me, i had to leave work at 4pm... sorrie eddie, din mean it but it really hurt too badly...

and i become one of those want mei dont want life de liao... it looks really more professional but it really hurts, so much that i bravely walk while outside but behind the curtain, i pause and squirm my tender bruised toes inside... OUCHHHHHH... if only i can have my darling $23.90 shoes... awwwww....

anyway, work was alright loh... i kinda think they are training xiaoyan to be collar cos she has been the collar for quite long since i remember bcos she's been doing collar a number of times already... i saw QN, but i felt like she's changed, WEIRD i say... why? i also dunno...

and i saw elaine! OMG... well... i did miss her and she looks as chio as ever... hahas... too bad i wasnt working till night... if she was disappointed in that slightest bit, i will be damn happy already... hahas... i guess im one that's hungry for recognition... hahas...

and im very disappointed can...i went thru all the trouble to buy chui kway for them and they were not in the least bit appreciative... sian... still tink v8 de pple better... at least i buy for them they will thank me leh... the human nature sux such that, when you're with A, you miss B and vice versa... shit.

went out with joy joy... went tamp o look for my $23.90 shoes there... shit.. no stock either... so i left mui name and everything, asking them to contact me asap when the new batch of stock arrives... seems like there are alot of others wanting this pair also! they have good taste! just like me. hahahahahahas...

and i cut my hair... cos joy cut and since i decided not to curl so soon le so i cut also... now freaking short can! aiyo... and the hair that washed my hair, looks like 20 cos he has got SO MANY piercing around his mouth can? if not actually he quite alright looking de loh... zzz... and his younger then me xia... *stuns*

i dont really like the girl cutting mui hair... cos they way she talks is damn offensive... and she doesn smile to show that she is kidding or something... wth... joy thinks she's damn chio while i think she's alright only... as in nt bad but nt WOW you know... and i still insist i more correct then joy... in terms of taste! hahas...

think people that work in Jean Yip all got attitude prob... cos they dnt like to smile... and did i mention the hair washing guy has atrocious hair? its more to the left than the right if i din rmb wrongly and its purple on top, black behind, morhawk (however you spell it lah) style? super nan kan can... aiyo...

after which joy and me went bugis... i got another pair of court shoes, same price of $19.90 but really ALOT more padding... so sure not that pain le ba... and i bought a pai of slip ins also... like finally found lah... but i still like mui white one alot tho i threw it away le... too tyco le, not nice liao...

and joy and me ended up buying some kinda "outfitter girls' shirt"... hers says "friends dont let friends talk to ugly guys". while mui says "explain to me again why i need a boyfriend " and the same one as joy's. cos we like the same shirt so we have two matching ones again... hahas...

i like lah! must wear to shin and show everybody the "y nit bf shirt"! COOL>>>>>^^

MONDAY

today worked at v8... got released at 12pm and rushed there... know what? in my semi awake state i got off at dihby ghaut instead if city hall and took train back to somerset...!!! IDIOT!!! then i got down, went back to dohby ghaut and waited for the same train i alighted from 10mins ago... tell me how dumb is that?

but bugis is really much nearer to my school then vivo... i must really be kinda retarded lah... hahas.... find poly go so far de... work find also find different line de... so far from school also... what am i thinking? lucky i wasnt late for v8... think only auntie mary missed me lah... hahas...

daniel too... henry i dunno but i really wanna kill arh han lah! or making fun of me and henry... whenever i talk to him or vice versa, either chatting or over work, arh han will always mumble mumble to daisy or daniel... irritating fellow... you jealous izzit... zzz...

anyway, tonight tho tired but i still rmbered to look at the Raffles Hotel ppt and to watch mui dearie smiling pasta... to find that! alas!!!! its the last episode liao... lose something to look forward to liao lah... sad sad sad... any more new nice shoes to intro? haiz...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/07/2006 12:13:00 AM

Sunday, November 05, 2006


collar. it is the position in a restaurant whereby you handle completed dishes from the kitchen, tell servers or runners where to send the food to. it is the job whereby you have to handle stress, handle all the questions about where food ahs gone, which foods have not yet arrived and of cos, to hurry the kitchen politely about dishes that MIA for a long time...

this is a very challenging post... inside a restaurant, every post is not easy doing... however i am very interested in being that, cos i know that position is not easy and, auntie mary is good at that position.. hahas... she's my favourite auntie you know... must not let her down, must be good at it... so was happy when Ed made me collar...

but obviously M likes to be collar alot too... i saw her always doing it... i mean as in nobody assigns her and she just stays there, so somehow, in an unspoken way, she becomes the collar... today she was doing it again and i was doing it with her till Ed asked her to go out... she said okie but i know she wasnt pleased... zzz...

and she kept coming in, asking me if i was alright doing the task, with the SUPER FACE of i can take over one you know... LOLS... of cos i was irritated but i kept my mouth shut... R loves her, i must keep quiet and all i want it to do well in my collar duties... but there are always crop ups... i dont understand why...

now the grill is so much better already but the kitchen! their actions are really slow... their main courses go out before the appetizers... this is bad ain it... this is a problem i notice with ajisen nowadays also... they now serve my ramen first before they serve my sashimi sides! bad bad bad...

but their membership card is damn nice and stylo i tell you... kinda worth the $5 hahas... cos it makes me proud to carry such a mei mei de card... hahas... its black, has two of the cute ajisen girl, one in colour the other a fading effect and it has my full name together with the expiry date and everything in etched sliver characters.... cool man! hahas...

i like the new shoes and the way they make me feel.. dont know how to explain but i just feel more feminine in it... but i still hope hope hope that i was able to buy the pair i really wanted... the $23.90 pair... i really want it alot lah, tao yan. and the new shoes hurt sey... its either its too small for me, cos the sides hurt or that the shoes haven been seasoned yet...hope is 2nd reason cos i cant exchange them liaoooooo...

about today, thats abt it... worked five today, wake at 3plus...just nice, you guys know me huh... but bad thing is you dont get to eat before you go work... so you basically starve... and at night those leftovers, i dont get to eat de... sad case...

hair loving ting has been eating maggie mee goreng at hm for THREE days liaooo... lols... and tonight when bathing my hair keep dropping... omg... hope no hole xia... aku still mo curl hair de leh... haiyo... lols... and joy is cutting her hair tml... dont tempt me cos im almost about going to do something about my monster fringe! LOLS.

think i should go do some colouring to my hair first... rather than curling it, cos i think when im older than i try that kinda styles... cos i dont wanna LOOK old... hahahahahas... so i should save my colour contacts and hair colour for Christmas! i love festivals! *beams* get together for friends and family... exchanging presents, celebrating LIFE!!! =D

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/05/2006 02:13:00 AM

Saturday, November 04, 2006


yo! i just watched Slither... hahas... wanna comment abt e movie and add in some tots i forgot to blog down earlier... the movie is rather a success... hahas...

__abt Slither__

its about a story setting in which this college school teacher and her husband are both researchers of bio stuffs... hahas... and so the husband, Grant, finds this weird sticky goo dispensing creature in the forest after leaving the house due to a reject from the wife to ahem ahem...

he goes near the creature and gets aimed by a arrow from the creature the same second he says "wtf"... and so, the arrow penetrates his brain and stays there... from then on, he has to eat alot alot of meat, while keeping everything a secret from his beautiful, shapey wife...

the story escalates when he, in love for his wife, turns to eating another woman who often seduces him when his urge comes... from then, his wife starts to notice things are wrong and everything goes super wrong when Grant is a wanted figure...

now we look at Bill, this very handsome cop which i think has a thing for Starla, Grant's wife... he protects her thru the show and a very lucky girl who escapes being inflitrated by the slithering worms and gains the worms's history and memory during the process of escaping...

in the end, as Grant is killed by Bill giving one of his two tenacles gas (the other tenacle is in Bill, attacking him viciously)... Bill urges Starla to shoot her husband and the whole of Grant, together with every worm in them, making all the dead/undead another of Grant's voice, explodes and dies...

the surprise of the whole movie is that it did not show a worm slithering away at the end of the happy ending, because i have this perception that ang moh shows always like to do stuffs like that... but i really hafta cimpliment on their visual effects on bio stuffs... super awesome i say! *thumbs up*

__lessons to share__

maybe what im gonna say is what you guys have heard before, especially the Christians but i will say it here, for all those who haven heard it before to know... ytd i was quite upset, cos i was hungry and the other girls are eating... so after work, while waiting for my long awaited pay...

i was talking to liliana and nick at al fresco area... we were talking about fairness... nick is a Christian so most of what he teaches comes from the bible... he says...

"now let me state an eg. if im a plantation owner and i hire some workers to work 7 days a week, i offer them one gold coin and they agree, they start work. on the following day, i haire some more workers to work 6 days a week, i pay them one gold coin too and they start work..."

so he goes on to say till the second coin...

"and at the end of one month, tell me whether it is fair when i pay everyone one gold coin, when some work two days and get it, some work seven days then get it?"

know whats his answer ma?

"it is fair. this is because, when i say i hire you, it was agreed upon the number of days you work and the amount you will be paid. as for the others, if i decide i want to pay them more when they work lesser, you cannot say its unfair. this is because, this is my money, i pay staff the way i want. as for you, you should only care about whether did you fulfil your own responsibilities of covering your workload. "

__hmmm__

he says this world will always have slackers in work places... why care so much and make myself so upset when it isnt any of my business at all...? full timer or part timer, as long as you got do what you should, why care about do they work... as for the bosses, if they want to pay slackers higher pay, its their money...

i wun say im enlightened but the thing is, it makes me realise i should see open alot alot... i know i always has this dou ji yan de problem... i sometimes take things too hard le... hmmm... maybe is v8 ba... there were always the good old times when all the senior staff work together, we were fast, efficient, happy and whatever you name it...

maybe im abit at a loss here... in v8, the old times it was trying to exceed your abilities and out clear and out speed the other... i know even for susan's era, i move too fast, she says im like cartoon character... but at least it ensures i deliver fast service during peak hours...

but now, i must learn to be graceful... i must learn to depend heavily on tray... now is not about abilities but about displaying gracefulness... im not that kinda porcelain doll even tho i look skinny i know...i dont need to cat walk or parade around any FnB place and be able to carry alot of stuffs...

can be even more than guys... even tho they have more strength but im already stronger than alot of girls or i made sure that i was... if you are not super pretty, am super accident prone, and do not have a size that petite as compared to other girls so much so that people wanna dote on you...

well, its time to get up and work like hell to make people like you, kitchen dote on you, boss to appreciate you, manager to put more of your schedule... so on and so forth...

__SHIN DOs & DONTs__

DO

1. smile
2. friendly yet professional
3. start every address with Sir or Mdm
4. maintain graceful posture at all times
5. be as patient and tolerant
6. equip self with tone as tho customer is bigger than your dad (or whoever you wanna name)

DONTS

1. walk fast (im a cartoon character...you get what i mean?)
2. treat customer as your friend (overfriendly...shit, isnt this me?)
3. be hardy instead of lovely (well i dont wanna be lovely, i AM hardy; lols)
4. send food to wrong table (nt that bad, now i can agar table area so much better...)
5. forget to cancel sashimi slip before delivering sashimi (i always forget cos not seasoned to action)
6. make mistakes, even if do, dont get caught by aw...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/04/2006 01:19:00 AM

Friday, November 03, 2006


THURSDAY (ytd)
work was lousy... cos i felt like i was working and the others were eating...ain i hungry also? ha. ha. ha.
family wise was lousy, to think my parents asked the agent out and took things into their hands... only mz was on my side... c'mon, ain saving a good thing? *scoffs*

supposed to meet cher yet she put me plane yet again, without informing NOR responding. wth. not the first time already... wanna go eat supper with Li Fang and Sherine also cun, even tho i was freakingly damn hungry. zzz... i miss bonding with them... i wanna have supper with them!!! sorrie girls... haiz...

guess i must be such a failure being a waitress... the more i listen to the briefing, the most i think im not suited... maybe v8 suits me more afterall... no frills no stress... and i have people who dote on me there... sk i think only gt 3 people better to me only...as in working kindness good to me...

what am i doing...trying to compare... the two places can never be compared.. what i've learnt and went thru with v8 and what i have started out with sk till now can never be compared... yet both teaches me and affects me in both ways... im glad i entered sk with experience...

for at least i learnt harsher things at v8 but at least the people there were more patient with me... shall the place one day no longer tolerate my clumsiness, the clumsiness that flows in my blood, i will and shall be glad to go... for i can try prevent it, reduce it but things will not change that im accident prone... its in me...

i hate unfairness and i hate people who hurt me... i hate to care for everyone and give my heart to some and they use it to hurt me... i hate i hate i hate... why must i always be the one to be hurt... its been so long since i cried over work or family or friends and it all had to happen ALL in one night...

how to bear it? i wasnt prepared. i wasnt immune. i wasnt myself, the one who cried on the streets, late at night, left to walk home alone... in tears and with a broken heart. i cant exist in a place where im unhappy, else i will lose all colour, fade away and die...

FRIDAY (today)
went for school early after a emotionally draining night of angry, sad, frustrated tears... went to school with a and no soul... dragged thru lessons, as usual slept in class... cos was too tired already... cos rmb i said i was ver hungry...?

i ended up cooking instant noodles for supper or dinner or dunno what you call it... hence i slept rather late... haiz... actually wanna starve myself as punishment to who i also dunno... i just know it was meant to be punishment... but in the end, it dawned on me that it was my body, my stomach, my suffering hence, its punishing myself, isnt it?

after school, went to watch DEATH NOTE. like finally lah, the second coming out already then i watch the first... wth... anyway, the movie was nice tho the seats sux... and it wasnt comfy... but lucky beside me got nobody so i managed to occupy two seats!!! wahahahahahaha...

L is cute but not in the good looking sense, and his abit wacko... lols... two genius, one calm and composed the other gao sheng mo che... wahsey... tough fight... hahas... but lightto actually sacrificed his gf! who loved him! where can like that xia... super evil leh... and L is like me... eat non stop de! LOLS

and i wanna watch happy feet can! the penguins so damn cuteeee... hahas... i guess i must still be dreaming if i think i can get one of my another friends to go watch with me cos ta bian le... sad to say... dunno whether we still able to watch cartoons together anot... well... maybe we will meet in the theatre... lols...

anyway after watching movie, i go meet mz while jt went back shool and alvin balei kampong... hahas... and me and her shopped ard sk... bought shoes, wallet, ate at the food court... bought sweets and earrings and we also balei kampong... but the bus was damn uncomfy also... the seats too straight, sit or sleep also gankor...

long time since i giddy on bus liao... haiz... really feeling super tired today... what a miracle i can tong till now... and i realise work wise, im still not busy enough... cos i realised im no longer needed at both places... think i must be bian tai... lols... die die wan work at busy de places... hahas...

cos when i work i wanna be able to forget everything ma... i dont want to have time to rest... maybe i shld accept all those modeling places that pester me or that day that guy who asked me join his surveying group... zzz... and mummy wants to keep pestering me abt e money... ARGH. everybody please shut up, i just wanna sleep...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/03/2006 10:40:00 PM



aijisen's SAKE SASHIMI!!!! yummy! and no wasabi please... hahahahas...
the grude two! i dont think its really scary but shall take it down outta fun... so glad that tho chocolate is only 1.3 megapix, the cam doesnt produce shit... thank heavens for that... hahas...
dont really wanna watch this movie but just thought the poster nice so i took pic of it anyway... since we got too much time before our movie... hahas... Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/03/2006 10:37:00 PM



i tell you, his damn cute!
penguins in ballet training!!!
everybody dance now!!
23th november!!! i die die wanna watch it... NICEEEEEE Posted by Picasa

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/03/2006 10:27:00 PM

Thursday, November 02, 2006


i AM selfish... i know i am only human... i know i am a full time student, part time waitress... yet i insist that i take two jobs... telling myself i will leave the old one as soon as i find a new one, when i know it in my heart fully well that i will not be able to leave neither, cos im not a leaver...

a leaver being someone who can have the heart to leave messes behind him or her and just move on...know why i have all this thoughts now ma...? cos everytime i lose my phone, i get another chance to get a new one... last time i got my N6280 by signing thru papa's line... and this time, i gt my chocolate by signing thru my bro's line...

its like everytime i have to bear something, i do not really suffer the consequences... *sighs* same as to work... i am such a rotten person... i will worrie abt what R might do to S but i did not consider what i did to v8... today met daniel cos he called and i happened to be in bugis...

i went art friends and visited li pin... miss her so much... after that went get my pay... did not get to see henry... but i went back after dinner... went to have dinner at ajisen with mz, cher, lynn and our hao jie mei daniel... lols... he tyco tyco always join me and my girls de...hahahas...

henry has been very unhappy these days or so daniel says... and i understand from everyone that its only when an artist dies, then his works will be popular... i firmly do believe so... bcos when im working, hardly anyone really talks about me but from what i heard from daniel is that i have been their hot topic for the week... zzz...

as long as henry unhappy they will say is we quarrel, o pls lah, like i will quarrel with him like that... he was msging his friend at boss hse party and damn arh han starts saying he was msging me all cos henry refused to show him the msges... all the san ba guys i know... lols...

but i guess since i wanna work two places, i gotta bear the responsibility of working at two places and not concentrate on either and neglect the other... cos even tho sk is new, its slowly getting on track already... maybe not to lw's expectations but i guess now things are far worse off at v8..

you will always find xiaoyu at the place where they are more needy... i guess at least sk is a livelier place to work at rather than v8 so i shld go there more often to spread some joy... im so guilty can... when today my dear auntie mary accused me of not working more... sob sob sob...

wed is normally the day me and her go shopping together de... but today was my whole only rest day of the whole week... haiz... i guess im really i very blessed child lah... and when reached home, mummy bought my favourite chilli crab!!! omg... if i die tonight, i died a happy girl...

poor cher... i will be hoping the sliver lining for the dark cloud she's under now de... and cher, you dont hafta rush and pay me the money you owe me asap lah... wait till you get your pay ba... =D

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/02/2006 12:24:00 AM

Wednesday, November 01, 2006


hey hey hey! im back! hahas... got miss me anot? hahas... sorrie for lagging on blogging these days... same reason, have been tired and always reach home so damn late, i bathe and i sleepppppp.... and i still dun have enuff sleep... can imagine...?

sunday, i worked full day and i cancelled cafe's night schedule... you guys know abt it that my phone gt stolen right? so i was practically uncontactable these days... on one hand i was alright with it, the other hand i was thinking abt the people i will offend...

for sure, i will not and cant respond to their msges and calls de right... o gosh, hate to think who and what i have missed out... and friends in sch i meet these days are all complaining that i didnt reply... lols... and alvin and jt are asking me where my phone is... (they teasing me one, cos they knew i lost it... =.=''' )

work these days was fine, for ste had a off day and a mc day... i rmb ytd, (monday) when i just woke up mui eyes were hurting quite bad... cos i did not sleep well, was heaty and kept rubbing eyes the previous night i rmb... due to irritation... sad to say...

but ed msg me say nobody came and die liao... how to stay at home xia like that... so i rushed down loh... wahlau eh, look at the crowd ard vivo you sure giddy de... cos i did... and i reached there ard 1 plus? hahas... even lily on off also came back... mon was the day step mc...

sherine is at camp these days... mon to thurs... so these days shall be rather peaceful without any boycotting and stuffs... the new girls was alright, to me but i feel that something is lacking... something that i have more with the senior girls than the new girls... maybe they nt as open to me or what, i cant name it...

and yea, that day i called daniel to ask him help cancel my schedule... and everything we were talking abt, a girl was echoing it in the background... damn irritating can? and i recognised her voice... amanda. so i just said thanks and hung up, immediately...

who knows what they were busy with you know you know... and i called him like midnight? knowing he also night owl de? hahas...and today cher called me say gt urgent matter need to contact me... so it appears she was at mz hse... and mz said daniel was trying to reach me...

i have always disliked people who disturb mui friends when they cant reach me... and remind me to scold him for that... its not as if he had something urgent to contact me... and i wonder what winnie has in stall for me when she kept contacting me and calling mui hse... hmmm...

i typed out everything alrdy... and it gt erased... so pardon me but i guess i wanna point form things alrdy...

--was kinda irritated with someone who doesnt wanna talk to me...
--was happy for the peace in sk these days...
--i damn damn damn desperately need mui pay...
--i gotten new phone alrdy... pls start contacting me if need be...
(so that i can save all mui contacts de number also)

i miss bee alot alot alot alot.. and i'd give anything for her to be back to her round, jolly, innocent and loved child...not the girl that has the eyes of those who seen too much of the world and the frame of one whose been thru all the harsh weathers of life... mui poor darling bee... haiz...

i'd give anything for all of us to be back to how we were, happy and carefree, in secondary... i mean, anything.

2b continued...

Wished She Was Loved ;

11/01/2006 03:05:00 AM

Saturday, October 28, 2006


every body has many different sides... sensitive, heck care, optimistic, pesstimistic... recently i just feel so much tempted to give in to my pessitimistic side... daniel called me late last night to talk and ask after me... and he showed me the pesstimistic side...

of cos i had to assume the optimistic side and tell him the good thingss but i myself also know, the things he said makes sense also...haiz... if it could happen to him, it could happen to anybody... and anyway, i cancelled my predential plan, bcos mummy threatened to fall out with me if i do not...

and the coincidence is that the agent talked to me online, so i cancelled it while being on the mummy... i lost my phone today... know why? cos it got stolen... dumb me... i think i must be seriously retarded and unlucky...

being here at cher house... i called back home to check cos i guess they should have called me... and my phone, being stolen, surely is phone off response... i cancelled the line already... and im ever so unwilling to tell mummy...

but in the end i still did and we both talked on phone till we both cried tons... haiz... its like, she said i changed and stuffs so we exchanged pointers, and she made me cancel the plan... we just hung up the phone... (3.21AM)

i have so many things to do and think about... but there's only one me and i do not have enough time to do everything... i want to complete alot of things but there is only one thing...

at my age, im still letting my parents worrie abt me and mummy finds it so hard to let me go, despite me being 18... i know perfectly why, its all bcos i haven grow up to be 18 yet, i have the looks and age of it, but not the maturity and the responsibilities...

seriously, i dont remember anything about my childhood, except from photos... i remember almost everything from my teenage years, tho not all were pleasant...

but i guess i hafta be thankful for all the luck i have also... for SK girls accepting me, for my friends accepting me as i am, be or without make up and in whichever mode i am in...

i suddenly feel that we all have no time in life to concentrate on insignificant things in life, but we are all so stubborn abt it, ain we... everybody is insignificant, so indispensible ...however, everyone deserves the chance to be happy and to be loved...

i miss home and i miss mummy...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOY!

Wished She Was Loved ;

10/28/2006 02:20:00 AM

Friday, October 27, 2006


SK AFFAIRS

today work's let me meet up with more of the new girls... and i do not remember their names just yet... all three of them, all aged 15 only... all no prior experience... Ed's gonna watse alot money grooming them i guess... but i hope they can really learn and work to help him and of cos everyone inside the restaurant...

i was rather happy that today i was given a chance ot be the collar, the position that is the most stressful i suppose... Elaine really works wonders! she's such a great one man.... hahas... but i was kinda pissed off that, even tho there were not many customers, LW should have stayed beside me for awhile and teach me some basics first or something?

cos im definitely nervous and kinda not used to it yet lah... and i did not see some of the kitchen copies, so i asked the kitchen to tell me the number... lucky that there was not much orders so they could help me... slowly i picked up and no longer needed them to tell me the numbers...

i was rather upset that LW was not there to help... i mean he supposed to be assisting or coaching me de right? and he just stayed outside and asked whether everything was alright ONCE. i asked him where was the new green tea powder holder if there was one...

he said there was a new one and ignored me from then on... made me hafta ask Reuben and he said there was no new one... i hate troubling people the last thing i want, is to be a liability... i want to be of help...gotta trouble kitchen people and Reuben all cos LW wasnt there... ZZZ

all the talk about him being mature enough... whatever ba... and i heard more complaints from the girls about seeing him show favouritism towards Stephanie... what to do? same old story again ma... nothing new... all i can do is ask them be patient and please be tolearant towards any unhappiness bcos of Reben and Ed who has been working so so so hard...

i have the kitchen to thank for helping me warm up on being collar, i hafta thank Li Fang and Sher for being ever so willing to help me serve my food items... if not for them, the night would not have been so smooth... im ever so lucky that everyone dote on me in their own sense...

i know the new people dont really like Sher, i know, cos she talks in a bossy manner... but she management staff so maybe thats why... she thinks she has been too friendly with us that she does not have a authoritive position so she wanna have it now with the new girls ba, for fear that they wun listen to her i guess...

im happy to say im really very alright with the anti-full timer group and the full timer group... im thankful for all of it and i hope i can make it that they can improve their relationship with each other... Sherine, i know her... she is unhappy and stubborn to change her initial views of people, but i know she is fair...

if she dont like you, it doesnt mean she overlooks your strength, thats the gd part, shall work on this to make her and Sher de relationship better i hope... when i see Sher's actions, i know that they are meant to be good, just that maybe she did it too harshly or something...

so i must try to remind her that i know she's doing good, but she must try see how it appears to others... i want everyone to be happy... i dont want and wun take sides... better still if there were no sides anyway... im starting to feel really attached to the place and i know i will stay...

the rough parts shall be trying to not feel irritated with LW i guess... boss yes, but a guy all the same... and i swear he biased against me but i shall not leave, cos the others care for me exceeeds that by aplenty...

TING AFFAIRS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOY!
now that its past midnight, happy birthday JOY, mui dearie! hahahas... i know im gonna see you tml, but just let you know, i miss you alrights? =) one year older, must stay pretty and keep in touch with me... must not choose bf only, dont want me... hehe...

school today was alright tho i fell asleep... even the teacher also can do nothing about me... guess i gotten myself a reputation liao... lols... nvm, what she teaches is easy lah... at least for now... hahahahas... and i haven watch death note! i want i want i want!

and stoopid alvin lied to me can... he say jt is neutral liao but he is not can... today went out with him, alvin and cher and i sensed he is not lah... sian... I JUST WANT TO BE FRIENDS. he is a guy who can listen and i need a friend like that...

maybe along the way i might feel lonely or have the yearning to get a bf, however i would rather not have any if its not the type i want... i'd rather wait for the one i feel for, rather than to be with many wrong ones just for convenience sake... i pray hard that jt doesnt drop any more testing questions... pray for me too please, thanks...

Wished She Was Loved ;

10/27/2006 01:30:00 AM

Thursday, October 26, 2006


so as not to test my memory of remembering what actually happened these days, let me just say what happened today. im rather sure that it should be enough to entertain youuuuuuuuu...

MORNING

had to wake up early for school... actually there was no school today but i had a make up lesson... but im always seeking for fun and excitment... so i chose to skip mui make up lesson and crash cher lec at TAS (tourism academy at sentosa; if i nt wrong)...i reached ard 1 and half hr earlier...

and jt was msging me, peiwen was msging me, made me feel so left out actually, due to reaching ealry and skipping class that i actually regretted mui decision of skipping the make up class...but im already late, cannot cry over spilled milk liao...
so i waited for cher to come, had breakfast with her at Seah Im hawker centre... the food is nice and cheap... and i ate 4 eggs leh... the breakfast dunno how boiled kind? lols... talk about being hooked... hahas... and nai lemak loh...


and i had a huge quarrel with mummy and papa before leaving house... haiz... always de leh... cos papa dig mui bag and found the Predential agreeement i have, the one abt saving $70 a month de... and being able to withdraw money after saving for a year and can withdraw $500 yearly from 2nd year onwards...

they were ranting and ranting non stop after how dumb i was, why din i consult them before signing, and why was i so foolish to do it and why didn they do it too if it was really that good... but im already so old le, cant they let me decide what i want?

you know people are shocked when i say i let mui mum keep mui IC cos she's scared that i would lose it? but its e truth and i also dun dare bring it with me, cos i know i have a high chance of losing it also anyway... but some things i want to be able to decide, its just $70 a mth, with 2 jobs, dun tell me i cant even afford that...

and mummy says i have changed... people who really know me should know that i am always affected by words said like this... especially from people who mean to me... i mean at my age, i know i do really put mui friends as priority over family but i still do feel for mui family de loh... so what she says, hurts...

she says she doesnt know me anymore... so what is that supposed to mean... i reach home, dad's asleep, i reach home, mummy also asleep cos she gotta wake and work early the next morning... i can always say i prefer having a housewife-ed mummy but i know she is happier to be working and i respect that... but alot things have changed...

so many times i do not have her, i learnt to be abit more independent... i learnt not to cry that much, be that emotional, to expose myself to the whole wide world, tho mz always says that this few mths, i have been crying very easily over work, be it V8 or SK... and its always outta anger even tho i do hold it to the last sec... haiz...

but there was also one time when mummy said she thinks i have become stronger, ever since i had my braces, for i was so afraid of pain the last time i would cry when i felt pain or determined aches even tho i was a dare devil in games and trying out new stuffs... i do not want to backtrack and deprove...

AFTERNOON

went singing at k ster with cher at china town after sleeping at her lec cos its really damn boring... and the lecturer actually close one eye xia... and we sang all the way from ard one plus till seven close to eight plus... went to have our kolo mee...

we sang alot of songs leh... hahas... but today de mood somehow i handle sad songs super good, happy songs average only and challenge de alrights loh... cos mui voice wasnt in tip top condition from the beginning anyway... hahas...

and i was so looking forward to getting pay cos im really broke and need to celebrate joy bdae sommore... then what, joy can lend me money to celebrate your birthday anot? lols... kidding lah hor joy... lols... *dont bite me* hahahahas...

kolo mee was not bad, today i rather lame, actually wanna da pao kolo mee ask whether SK pple wan eat anot de, then after that decided not... what if they dunno what is kolo mee, what if they think its not nice, what if i buy le they dun want, what if i buy le not hot liao ETC, hahas... so i din buy loh...

NIGHTS

went back harbourfront... rotted ard, waiting for SK to be free and me to be receiving pay... poor cher, rotted with me... to be chatting outside while sitting down is nice but we were both very tired girls just wishing for sleep... lols... and the retarded girl sudeenly declares she wanna eat TAO HUAY...

this kinda time, where find that? and she suggested Geylang... auntie stolen, aku no have transport except bus 11 leh... haiyo... then we were behaving like bims, when beer called out mui name while squatting beside lamley and having a smoke... lols...

i was about to leave already when i saw Ed at the door... speak of the devil... think of i mean... and he said he needed to talk to me but cher was hungry and im very very the cold you know, so we left for HBF point, and bought stuffs at cheers...

actually i wanted to go home liao, thinking Ed kidding ard, but he called me up and asked me back so i bo bian loh... i asked cher go home first liao, she say she pei me... haiz... thanks and sorrie... but i was glad that she was there lah...

and Ed told me something that made me feel STUNNED. STUNNED is the word... he said, I FOUND YOUR BLOG.

ED, LW : :

i read back all mui entries already. im sorrie on the point that i did not think it would do any harm to the business when i blogged anything. it was all abt mui work place, from mui view... to think that actually when i posted the photos i just wanted to show mui friends how mui new work place was like, and whether this could increase popularity for SK.

anyway, i dont think i will be removing the posts cos there is far to many, all mui memories... starting fromt he courses we had all the way till now... still far from capable but at least i see something... and i realise, i will not editing the posts either, in terms of words i mean...

because i find that i did not behave or think differently as i blogged the stuffs myself... im unhappy i tried to smile, im happy, i smiled, all as said in mui blog. for some of lw case, its just i din say things out, i did not act differently or faked anything. altho i was rather surprised why he did not tell me he found mui blog... and when did he find it... i do not say i dont like who and behave super well to who so i guess im keeping it all...

but its so hard not to mention mui work place inside mui blog! mui blog is what i feel, what i think, where i go, who i am with... and i want mui friends to know how im doing... this is important to me... gotta mention mui work places, cos its part of mui life, not to por or whatever, but as a matter of fact...

so i decide to put password to mui blog instead....so only mui close friends will know whats happening or what, and not the whole wide world who uses google and gets the 6th result... haiz... to be blogging this now, i know i gonna be tired tml but there is simply no time i can fix in to blog all these stuffs already...

actually i also dunno why i was so shocked and stunned when Ed told me you guys found mui blog...i guess its the way it got found ba... but next time whenever i see you guys, its gonna remind me of this and i dread this... but i will try work as usual, to the best of mui abilities but i need time... im not a task orientated person... X<




I WILL BE PUTTING THIS BLOG JUST AS IT IS FOR THREE DAYS AND AFTER THAT, A NEW PASSWORD WILL BE IMPOSED, FRIENDS WHO KINDLY WANTS TO KNOW ABT THE PASSWORD, PLEASE TAG MUI BOARD. THANKS AND SORRIE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE. =)

Wished She Was Loved ;

10/26/2006 01:20:00 AM