MiSs RaInIeGaL
29/09/zzzz
LiBrA GaL

HER NICKS:

TiNgTiNg
XiAoYu
MiSs STM
BlUr QuEeN
XiAyU
SoToNg QuEeN
MeOwMeOwTiNg
CoMpLaInT qUeEn? hahas...

LIVES FER:

FoOd!
SlAcKiN
SlEePiN
TaLkIn
ShOpPiN
ReAdInG
MoViEs
NaiLaRt
NiTeS
FrEnS
HaPpInEsS
CaTs
WaYnE LiN JuN JiE
HeBe
MuSiC
FuN & ExCiTmEnT

FIGHTS WITH:

VuLgArItIeS
TeArS
DeAfEnInG SiLeNcE
HeArTbReAkErS
LiArS
HyPoCrItIeS
BaCkStAbBeRs, BeTrAyErS
SeLfIsHnEsS
BaD hAiR dAy
FlU!!!

GoOd GrAdEs (all pass? lols)
MoRe FrEnS
CuTiE Of HeR oWn
CoUnTlEsS $$$
SiNgInG cOuRsEs
SaTiSfAcToRy JoB
HaPpInEsS
50 sMiLeS a DaY =D
LiVe In FaNtAsY dReAm WoRlD

ALL ALONG

P jOy
LyNn
xUeLiNg
mEi JiE
mEi HuI
XiNyU
wAn YinG
LiNg Ta/LyNdA
KeLLy
CeCiLiA
rOaN<
gAo ZhEng
SeRI
KeN
JaSoN tOh
SuYeE
jEaN
ViCtOr
JiE yI
aMiLiA
KeLLy
sHeReEn
ZiQiNg

FORGET THEM

wacko cher! part one...
wacko cher part 2
wacko cher part one
bee n me!
great work attitude! yea rite~
me n jj! (jia jin nt junjie...ooh sad...lols)
me n cher de neo
...cher hse...
...short hair vs long hair...
***WaT a DaY!***

AND SAY

**
 

YOU LOVE ME

Sunday, August 06, 2006

ytd...supposed to meet cher at s-11...she was late... when i reached, she was still at hm... when she reached her reason was that her sister in law held her back from going out of the house because her room was too messy and she had to stay back and tidy up. owells...

after tat kelly msg me, saying she was getting engaged already? have i already mentioned before that i have interesting frens...? yea... after tat mz came n joined us aft an unhappy trip wif zhi hao... then GL came and returbed me mui brown wallet like so finally after a long long time... hmmm... then we 4 were crapping... somethink just felt different, so very different...

now my days, i feel like im just living it day by day, today i do not rmb what i did n went out wif ytd, (e above was mz's reminder) i just dunno what is happening with and to me, everything seems like a big big blur...izzit memory failing or izzit selective memory...and i sgnificantly rmb mui ytd was spent chatting and chatting only. i so hate myself yet its me myself.

2dae i woke up late cos ytd was changing blog skin and for many other reasons...zzz...tis morning was really very happy to see smartie online like so early in the morning...noe y? cos people have had a full complete cycle of 12hrs sleep and just had 2 wake, while me, being 6am close to 7am, did not sleep and mr silly still tot i woke up early, lols...

haiz...exams very busy, no time to contact him, but i shall make up for it ba... frens are just like gardens, it needs to be maintained by watering it with care and concern from time to time to keep it beautiful...

so today went library to study, was not much use and i end up studying in kids section because there was no available seats in adults section for students, wandering students i might say. at ard 7 plus, which is not even 2hrs of studying, the libry personnel came n chased us away already, not to forget, i slipped out for ard 15mins to buy my bubble tea... cos gt the too-strong-urge le... >_<... [blueberry milk tea n strawberry red tea, btw]

when libry's closing time came, we headed for a LJS dinner... sze chia called! she asked after me and we had quite a chat... haiz...missed them, glad to know that they missed me too... during work, they were the people who made me feel loved... and i kinda feel kinda really dumb to have given up people who doted on me fer some non existent stuff...

during dinner mz me cher was talking bout damai sch days...READ CAREFULLY... cher said she felt very extra, bcos me and lynn were partners, and she always was the one who was left out... i did not say anything much because i did not want to spoil the mood. but i really felt the pain and hurt all over again... all the bad memories came flooding back, i guess alot other friends were part of the people who knew what happened...

guess ken and joy knows it ba...i just feel very very sad and angry over one particular PE lesson, i wonder whether joy rmbs... hahas... to me, suddenly to me, that lesson was one chance that people could see the true ugliness of the click i was in... anyway, thinks are over and there were so many little details that was more significant to me that i am willing to go back to the old days.

at that time, i was more happy but more of a wallpaper then a person. mayb that was what make me more attractive even tho i did not look as good as i am now... do you realise, we are all more attracted to people who are more outstanding and alone in their click? actually that was the reason why GL was attracted to me in the first place ba... even he himself agrees, lols...

nvm , no matter what, things cant be reversed and i just am so not going to think back about the days because it will just remind me of how i was unfairly treated in the past. however what i really have to say is that i really learnt alot. things that i can never get to learn from books, but onli frm people, because it is all EQ stuff. its more of about how to not naively believe that ur partner will stick by you, unless you are as fortunate to be like ling ta and cecilia, who have found and stuck by each other...

sometimes i so dun want to think back about how left out i was, because mz says that being extra is a small matter, bcos everyone has tot of themselves being extra before. but i think and feel that, we... it depends on whether was it justified and whether was there reasonable grounds for believing in it... (innocent misrep? negligent misrep? fradulent misrep? lols)

i just prefer to live and rmb the nicer memories of e4 and whole sec sch life, and i so very dislike the fact that the unhappy past had somehow been dug out...that is why i have always said its so much better to be living in a fantasy world...no tears, only joy...

have you ever realised? people who seem so very cheery and sunshine on the outside... take a look at their blogs... ain they either gothic or only have sad entries? i ahve seen so many examples ard me that i lost count, like seriously. have you ever wondered the cause for all the irony? i have, for... i guess... i am one of them...

its all being true to urself...for me, i am not happy with mui click in poly, for they treat me, lets just say not very good and to stay means to be lesser of the real me, and to activate the entertaining me in me. we shld all ask ourselves in a day, any day, all our smiles, how many are heart felt and how many are muscle activated...

we do not live alone, we live in a world with many other people, with different ages, everything
different foe even twins would not be similiar, less say just somebody walking on the streets. its all about surviving while having inter linked relationships with everybody. its all about being true to yourself. we are all what we make ourselves seem to be, we show what we want others to be.

at the very end of the day, we are the only ones who know and see ever so clearly who and how we are like and really are. for some people, when the night arrives and surrounds with deafening silence, some people cry themselves to sleep, some feel the hurt and pain and they sympathize with themselves while some are so numb they do not even feel a single thing.

there are just so many people who have not been true to themselves and so many people who have not been treating people right and has not even tot of changing themselves... what to do? vicious cycle i say...

Wished She Was Loved ;

8/06/2006 10:43:00 PM